I don't take anything personally anymore, and this has been phenomenal in achieving lasting change and a greater joy in my relationship with myself and with others in the world.
I am truly amazed on how making this agreement with myself has shifted my entire life and made me free no matter what others have to say or think. I just wish I’d grown up knowing that!
You probably know the feeling.
Don Miguel Ruiz, the author of the book THE 4 AGREEMENTS explains it so well:
“Whatever happens around you don’t take it personally. Nothing other people do is because of you. It is because of themselves. All people live in their own dream in their own mind, they are in a completely different world from the one we live in. When we take something personally we make the assumption that they know what is in our world and we try to impose our world on their world. Even when a situation seems so personal even if others insult you directly, it has nothing to do with you.
What they say, what they do, and the opinions they give are according to the agreements they have in their own minds…
Taking things personally makes you easy prey for these predators, the black magicians. They can hook you easily with one little opinion and feed you whatever poison they want, and because you take it personally, you eat it up…But if you do not take it personally, you are immune in the middle of hell. Immunity in the middle of hell is the gift of this agreement”
Let me ask you a few questions:
Do you ever feel rejected?
Do you ever take seriously what people think about you?
Do you ever take decisions in your life based on what people might think?
Do you ever get triggered by someone’s opinion?
Only a very few people don’t. We all have been in those places where we don’t feel free or empowered, just because we have not yet gotten in touch with the voice of our Inner Self.
It’s time to break free especially when you are in the process of divorce, because everything will be a minefield, and there will always be a reason to take things personally.
Be forewarned that the anger and the fear will take over and make it worse than usual.
Take a moment, and think about it:
How would your life be if you decide that the opinions of others has nothing to do with you?
What would your life look like if you never took anything personally?
What a revolutionary concept! What freedom you could experience your days with!
All you really must do to master this concept is to make a new agreement with yourself. Once you’ve done that, love will take control over you and will make you feel belief that every decision is yours. You may want focus on experiencing more freedom, more free will, more responsibility for your actions.
Ask yourself, “If I break free from other’s opinions, how would I feel?”
Focus on that feeling when you want do something, make a decision, or clarify a situation.
Practice this new agreement every minute of your life until you start to feel empowered by your own choices. Practice it over and over again, until it flows into your mind, spirit and soul.
Mastering this agreement, you are on your way to freedom and healing. You will feel responsible for your life no matter happens around you. You will make clear choices based on what matters to you and according to your values. You will master of being aware of what is important to you, and why. Each decision makes it clearer, and you feel the power of your free will.
By the way nobody loves being judged or told what to do. Act the same way with others in your life; let them be free of their decisions without being judgemental. We are all on our own journey and deep down we know what’s best for us. When you practice this agreement, you give permission and inspire others to do the same. You stop putting yourself and others in a box, and you stop relating to them through the lens of their past. You let everyone choose what they want and feel empowered by what led them to their choices.
Isn’t it powerful and beautiful?
When we are liberated of other’s judgements, a whole dimension of possibilities opens up and this is the beginning of a complete new experience in your life.
Practice, Practice, Practice over and over again. Nothing ever happened over night.
Do you have a comment, question or an inquiry?
What support might you need?
I’d love to help you!
I get many notes and emails requests and I do read every single email that comes through.
To get in touch, please feel free to email me at firstname.lastname@example.org
Transformational Relationship & Divorce Coaching.