When was the last time you have been honest with yourself? Truly honest.
As we live our lives, we are constantly making choices based on how we feel. Some of these choices are courageous and come from a place of love, some of these choices come from a place of fear, and don’t reflect who we really are.
When we make choices from a place of fear, or “I am afraid of”, our mind has a way to find so many excuses to justify our behaviours. We create these little stories in our head that will validate our choices. And we can go on and on until we are really stuck in situations we never really wanted in the first place or stuck in an emotional challenge that can prevent us to move forward.
Then we are forced to self reflect on our choices and why we created situations that don’t feel aligned with our essence, our truth. We may be confused, and frustrated but deep down we know that is preventing us to be greater than who we are. We are afraid of our light, and magnificence. Who am I to really think that I can be better than this? Am I allowed to think that way? Is there anyone who can validate my choice according to my highest good? If you pause a minute here, you can see that those thoughts are keeping us small. We will probably end up recreating the same experience over and over again.
What if we can operate from a different place or different programming than the one which is limiting us?
Is there a magic formula, or a potion that will help us to be unstoppable?
There is one magic formula: It’s you. It’s you being honest with yourself. It’s you being aware of all the limiting beliefs that you have accumulated along the years.
In order to start creating more honesty and to face what we fear, what makes us uncomfortable, what make us feel hurt, you can start by asking yourself:
What am I afraid of?
I am sure we can all make a long list here.
And, next time you will have an emotional response, ask yourself: What am I afraid of?
Ex: I am afraid of being rejected, I am afraid people will see who I really am, I am afraid to feel weak, I am afraid about my feelings, I am afraid of trusting people….. ( add yours to this list).
Depending on where you are in your human growth, It will require some courage and bravery. It will require compassion towards yourself. It will create more discomfort than you expect. Actually the more discomfort you feel, the more space you create for transformation.
The transformation comes from who you become being courageous and honest with yourself. It comes from the realization of your limiting beliefs. It comes from the resources you can start to tap in to transcend yourself.
I’ll be honest with you, I have done a lot of self-development work, a lot of healing, and a lot of growth, and I can still find myself hiding being honest, or not confronting myself with my fears. This is probably why I felt drawn to write about the topic.
I can recognize that each time I have been in vulnerable places or situations, the transformation was there too.
I can recognize that it never ends, that this is a lifetime practice.
Being honest with yourself is also being able to allow yourself to go with your own timing or own agenda. I don’t believe we can be raw, wild and vulnerable all the time. At least this is my experience.
It comes as waves of transformation, growth, and healing. And when you feel the waves coming in, that’s the time to be really honest with yourself and to give yourself a push up towards more light, truth, and light.
There is one thing that has helped me in the past until now. When I feel these waves coming, I don’t resist anymore, I allow a space to feel and heal. I talk less, I really dive into feelings. I reflect.
Then I remind myself that I always have a choice:
1/Opening and expanding my heart
2/Closing my heart.
I believe that life is about expanding our heart, opening up to love more and more without any fears.
Being honest with yourself is to start recognizing that we can open or close our heart. That we can live towards the light or stay in our limitations. That we can be courageous or fearful. That we have a choice in every situation. Being honest is making progress even if they are small. Being honest is always doing our best to live our life according to what really matters the most for us.
My invitation to you is to answer these questions :
-What really matters for you?
-What’s the one thing you want to accomplish in your life that would really be a heart opening experience?
-What would you want to be appreciated for?
Then how can you honor and honest to your answers in your life?
Transformational Relationship & Divorce Coaching.